Weekly Observations 3/21/07

1. Former MLB Commissioner Bowie Kuhn died last week. I tend to think fondly of Kuhn, since he was the only Commissioner with the testicular fortitude to reject a trade the Yankees made for being too lopsided.

2. Dick Cheney's leg was bothering him the other day, the same one he had a blood clot in a couple of weeks back. There were worries about the clot travelling to his heart, but instead it travelled to an undisclosed location.

3. Pete Rose was upset to hear the Kuhn died last week, he had May 23 in his dead pool.

4. I stopped caring about the NCAA BB Tournament the moment Albany lost, which was at noon last Friday as soon as they stepped onto the floor against Virginia.

5. Never have so many been so elated over a loss in the NCAA as when Duke lost. Perhaps the only other loss enjoyed more was the Yankees in 2004 to the Red Sox. BIGGEST.CHOKE.EVER!

6. I have to ask, a lot was made of Phil Mickelson's choke jobs last year, yet when Tiger lost on Sunday, shooting a final round 76, not a peep about his choking. I smell bias against men with man-boobs.

7. Sorry, I have just been informed that Tiger does not "choke", he simply decides he does not care to win.

8. Dancing With the Stars had its highest ratings ever Monday, as 21 million tuned in to see Joey Fatone and Ian Zering. Wait, you mean people wanted to see Heather Mills? Why, its not like she only has one leg or something.

9. So let me get this straight. Investigating the firing of 8 US Attorneys is not important. But investigating the firing of the White House Travel staff is?

10. So the Maple Leafs got revenge against Cam Jannsenn last night for his dirty hit on Tomas Kaberle. Hey Magoo, isn't that premeditated goonery? Shouldn't Wade Belak be suspended? Or was Jannsenn ask for it by daring to step on the ice?

11. Nassau County DA Karen Rice has decided to not press charges against Chris Simon for his hit on Ryan Hollweg. Hollweg decided he did not want to persue the matter, and Rice decided that she has other crimes more important to look into, like rape and murder.

12. Britney has left rehab. Bar Owners in California are rejoicing!

13. At the Mets game last night in Port St. Lucie, a fan decided to yell "A-Rod is better" as David Wright came to bat in the third inning. At what, choking with RISP?

14. During a broadcast of a Tom Brokaw special about Health on NBC last week, an affiliate in Arizona showed some hard core porn. The worker was fired, since he did not leave it on long enough to generate any ratings.

15. A woman on a flight from Delhi to London died in coach and was upgraded to first class. Wow, and you thought the $500 fee at the gate was tough.

16. Lastings Milledge cut his hair recently, in another step towards creating a better image. He then announced he was donating the hair to Britney Spears.

17. Note to El Duque, lets not run full out for a while, OK?

18. Andy Pettite could miss a start due to back spasms. Tell me again why the age of the Yankee staff is not a concern amongst the experts? Mussina is 38, Pettite 35, and Pavano, well, he just sucks. But the Met staff is old.

19. Doug Mientkiewicz is hitting a robust .077 this spring. Oh Dougie, you still suck. Tell me again why you hated the Mets?

20. Anna Benson has put her fat mouth in the spotlight again. She once again rails against the Mets for trading her husband Kris Benson for "a fucking bag of balls". Well Anna, they needed them, since you had Kris'.

21. Anna also said Kris is a 30 year old stud pitcher. What Anna fails to realize is that the bedroom does not tranfer to the field. She also said if she was a Mets fan, she would be beside herself. Well, this Mets fan is beside himself with giddiness that the Mets actually made it to the NLCS last year. Meanwhile Kris did what exactly?

22. It's OK Anna, you can crawl back into your hole now. I'm sure you can fit.

23. Isiah Thomas said that the Knicks were no match for the Dallas Mavericks. Wow, talk about a coach who knows how to motivate a team.

24. Zeke was right of course, as the Knicks lost 92-77. Then again, the Knicks aren't really a match for most NBA teams.

25. Several Pro Wrestlers have been named as having purchased HGH and Steroids in the ongoing on-line Roid case. Pro-wrestlers do steroids? Next you are going to tell me that the matches are fixed.