1. Our long national nightmare is over. We finally know Larry Birkhead is the baby daddy. Of course, Larry King will do stories on this for the remainder of the week.
2. Al Sharpton versus Don Imus. I'll pick the meteor to win Alex.
3. Yep, sure am sad the Mets didn't sign Jeff Weaver and Jeff Suppan this offseason.
4. Hey Barry Zito, how's it working out for you with the "no ego" guys?
5. The ghosts caught up and it is game over for Pac Man Jones. (did you like that, two puns in one sentance. I'm in a zone.)
6. NFL Teams will lose draft picks if guys they draft get into trouble. If only you couold get more picks if the guys you draft suck, the Jets would have had a better shot. Then again, maybe not.
7. Ed Belfour, goalie for the Florida Panthers, was tasered at a Florida bar by police. Eddie tried to use the blocker, but the cop went stick side. Could have been worse, he could have gone five hole.
8. The Yankees are blaming cold weather for the leg injuries suffered by Johnny Damon and Hideki Matsui. That's an improvement from last year, when they would have blamed A-Rod.
9. Speaking of A-Rod, he has 6 homers in the Yankees first seven games, including a game winning grand slam. Of course, the next time he drops a pop-up, the boos will return.
10. The score is 3-1, with Derek Jeter leading in errors. Of course, Yankee fans blame A-Rod for Jeter's fielding woes, since he dares to occupy the same side of the field.
11. I have to ask Imus, Don, have you looked at YOUR hair lately?
12. Kevin Durant is turning pro after one year in the NCAA. I'm stunned. A young man leaving college early?
13. President Bush is trying to find a retired General to be war "czar" to oversee efforts in Irag and Afghanistan. So far, 3 retired 4-star Generals have declined the role. They all claimed draft deferments based on being in college.
14. President Bush's spy chief is asking for expanded surveillance powers. This is a first, this time they are actually asking for permission to read your mail, tap your phones and see what library books you took out.
15. A NYC couple moving to Arizona has hired a cab to drive them rather than flying. Their rationale was that if they are going to be stuck waiting for 6 hours, better in a cab than on a plane.
16. A female Brooklyn Law School student appeared in a soft core porn show for Playboy. Now there are questions as to her moral fitness to be a lawyer. Wait, they decide whether someone is moral enough to be a lawyer? Since when?
17. The student claimed she did not know how the video got leaked. Her ex-boyfriend claims she linked to it on her My-Space page. He also said he is worried about his future since he appeared in the video briefly and does not want his future employer to find out. He said all of this in the newspaper. Under his own name. This guy is too stupid to be a lawyer.
18. NASCAR driver Michael Waltrip was charged with reckless driving after a crash. He hit a telephone pole and rolled his car. He was surprised when no one came to pull him out of the window or had a fire exstinguisher.
19. This Sunday, all members of several MLB teams will wear #42 in honor of Jackie Robinson. Of course, George Steinbrenner thinks it is in honor of Mariano Rivera.
20. Manny Acta, manager of the Nationals, thinks his team can replicate the job the 2006 Marlins did. Well, they have no good players to dump in a trade like the Marlins did before last season. And they have no good young talent. Manny should hope the Nats are as good as the 1999 Marlins (who went 64-98).
21. LA Angel Garrett Anderson will not be wearing Robinson's #42, because it wasn't his idea. He also plans on taking his bat and ball home.
22. The Knicks lost to the Bulls last night 98-69. After the game, the Knicks accused the Bulls of running up the score. The Bulls give away free Big Mac's if the Bulls score 100. Methinks the Knicks were more upset when they heard they coudl not cash in, despite being spectators most of the night.
That's all for this week folks. Be back tomorrow with a recap of tonights Mets game.
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8 comments:
7. Belfour realizes that his career is over. At 41, I'd be surprised if Florida re-signs him. But with Keenan calling the shots, who knows.
I have to ask Imus, Don, have you looked at YOUR hair lately?
Good one, Ed. He's a nappy-headed schmo.
Whoa, the lawyer crack was definitely NOT appreciated. Probably not by Mrs. Ed, either. :)
Oh, c'mon now Toasty. It was there for the taking. I can't pass up a lay up like that.
I'm a lawyer and I can't stand 90% of the lawyers I meet.
(Mrs. Ed excluded, of course.)
And Toasty, you're one of my foul tribe too? Sorry to hear it man. ;-)
Is everyone a lawyer? I'm one too. Is this a record for comments about one of your observations Ed?
That girl will be fine, my friends in law school were much worse. At least you usually can't get arrested for being in a porno.
As for Imus, I am sick of hearing about it, but I love how Chris Russo said he wouldn't care if somebody insulted his kid. Dad of the Year, anyone? At least Mike said he didn't know if he would be pissed if somebody badmouthed his daughter. Am I missing something here?
Mike, yes indeed I am. Which I guess makes me part of TWO tribes.
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