This Week in Wally's World

This week, Wally tells us the Mets are crazy to even consider signing Barry Bonds. He is appalled that they would even consider signing Bonds.

Of course, Wally conveniently forgets that this is the Wilpons we are talking about. Does he seriously think Fred would sign Barry? This is a man who traded Carl Everett after some abuse allegations were raised. This is the man who got rid of Bret "Bleach Boy" Saberhagen. The man who had Milledge traded. They let PLD go for pete's sake. The Wiplon's are nothing if not concerned about portraying a positive image these days. Gone are the days of the 86 team. Oh, they may have some fun guys like Pedro, but that is the exception.

What Wally wanted was for the Mets to say "NO WAY" when the question was raised about Bonds. Now, I want no part of Barry, but of course they are going to think about it. Every available player should be considered. At the end of the day though, the odds of Barry playing for the Mets are about as long as Fred inviting Wally into the owners box for every game this season.

And why wouldn't they sign Barry? I mean, he is an OBP and hitting machine. Well, frankly, so they wouldn't have to read stories by every NY area writer like the one Wally wrote. The Mets were tied to every story relating to steroids and HGH thanks to Radomski. Does Wally really think Fred wants the added attentionof signing a guy who is under federal indictment?

But Wally, in his own world, wants things done his way. No one should think, let alone act, in a way that would go against the principles of Wally's World. To even think about signing Bonds is anthema to all that he believes in. Of course, what Wally believes in is building a team the Yankee way. No HGH or steroids there, right Wally?

I wonder, where is Wally's article telling the Yankees to cut Andy (the bestest, most honest cheater in all of baseball) Pettitte. You know, a guy who ADMITTED using HGH? Oh, Wally ripped Andy. But did he tell the Yankees to cut him? Is he railing about Jason Giambi still wearing the hallowed Yankee uni?

Nope, instead Wally is taking a simple "we looked at Barry" comment and using it to craft yet another Mets bashing article. Which is nice, because it gives all Mets fans another chance to see him for the Assclown he is, and me more material to write about. So thanks Wally!

In Wally's World, you can do nothing right if you are the New York Mets. In Wally's World, everything they do should be thought of in terms of WWWMD? (What Would Wally Matthews Do?)

I can tell you what Ed would do if he ran Newsday. See if you can guess.

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In other news, the walking wounded are slowly making their return. Church, Easley, 'Stache, Endy, Dos Carlos' and Dirty all played over the past few days. This of course was a week after the sturm und drang from the local media about the myriad injuries on the team and how it meant they were screwed this coming season. As it stands now, only Moises is not expected to be ready for March 31. El Duque could also miss that date. In my mind, I would rather get the injuries out of the way now, when there is little pressure to play through them. Get healthy now. Play later. The games don't count at this point.

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As for the Islanders, well, what can I say. The season looked good at the start, but lack of offense killed them. Memo to Garth, please find a scorer. kthnksbye

As for the Jets, well, they've spent the GDP of a small country this offseason. Will it matter? We shall see. I'm reserving judgement. Should be an interesting draft. Wonder if they will take Darren (Daddy) McFadden.